Thursday, 31 January 2008

Topic of the day... after some random story of my past...

This is me when i was standard 2.

Came back from school (morning class). Had my lunch... did my homework(i think i did)... or maybe i didnt have any homework that day (more unlikely considerin i was in chinese school and they pile homework up everday). Anyways... all i remembered was that i didnt have anything to do... and i was bored... cartoon only started at 4 ( at least i thought it started at 4*story of that will come soon*) back then there was no astro, thus no cartoon network or disney channel to watch swatcats! centurions! or... gummi bears!

Anyways.. i took a shower.. came out.. and while i was takin clothes from my cupboard.. i noticed a video tape (*gosh.. that was so old school) on my bros part of the cupboard (we used to share cupboard and room) tittled: "GEORGE OF THE JUNGLE"

so i thought.. hmm.. might be some kids movie.. or cartoon.. or just a movie...

So this is me.. going in to my parents room to turn it on and stuff.. after 2 minutes of random conversation between one guy only wearing a leaf to cover his body and a girl who was fully dressed with white dress.. they started strippin.. and.. started doing it..

So there it was.. my 1st time watching porn! i didnt know what was happening.. i was like.. wtf (ok la.. i didnt know the 'f' part yet.. but you get the point)

2 minutes later.. my maid walks into the room to vacuum the room only to see me watching porn.. and she was like " WIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNN... what are you doing!!!!"

She told my mum about it.. i didnt get any scolding at all.. it wasnt my fault after all.. but my brother did!

So yeah.. possibly one of the reasons why my head is so messed up now.. haha

ok... thats my 1st time watchin porn story!! whats yours? come on.. just admit it!!!

now... to the fun part!!!

TOPIC OF THE DAY...

Did your parents ever gave you the 'sex talk' lecture? if so, how did they do it? Will you do it to your kids in the future? If so, how will you go abouts doing it?

couz seriously, i dont recall my parents givin it to me.. nothing at all! all i remembered was me buyin porn when i was 13 years old at the night market.. and hiding it at a place where i thought was perfect.. only to realise that .. 2 cm away from where i put the porn was where my mum hid her jewelries (its sorta inside the top layer of the cupboard that we had..where you can move the glass and put it inside.. but you cant reli see whats inside couz the light is in the way and you can only open up the glass that much hard to explain.. will show you photo next time) so yeah.. didnt feel what else was in there.. and i swear i thought i had the perfect hiding spot for my porn.. hmmm.. so yeah.. needless to say i got scolded big time!

Also.. this was my trick at night markets at how to get porn when i was 13.. up to the age of about .. 14. Go to the guy... look around his vcd's... and show no interest in any of the new movies that are out. If he ask you.. just say you have them all.. and he will know that you want porn.. and he will ask you... you want porn a? follow me to my car...where he will have a huge stash of porn!!!

Funny thing about porn is you never get what you asked for! the cover will be filled with hot hot girls.. and the girls in the porn itself is totally different! once i got one with the cover showing american cheerleaders and i got asian lesbians instead.. wth..

ok.. back to the story! yeah.. i didnt get any sex talk at all... rather disappointing.. though i think the only thing that my mum has ever said to me was rather.. influential.. and i think it will forever stay in my head.. all she said was..

dont do anything to other people that you dont want other people to do to your sisters..

Its good.. and.. yeah.. always affected by it.. but.. i want a cool sex talk like the famous one that ken got!!!!

kens dad: son, if you get a girl pregnant... dont worry... call pa... and we'll sort it out..
(i think its something like that.. maybe not word for word but its definitely close and the point was the same. This was what kens dad said to him while he was in the car on the way to airport i think? anyone wanna correct me if im wrong?)

so yeah.. cool stuff!!!

26 comments:

Cleverkiwibird said...

HAHAHAHA...is this a sneaky way of getting more comments since the previous one didnt get much !?

hahaha

i forsee a good number on this one though...

toetai said...

hahaha... maybe!!

no la.. just thought about it in my head while i was walkin back from uni.. haha.. so might as well rite..

besides.. i knew that the last post was just crap.. couz i was just crappin all the way.. haha so i wasnt expectin any comments...

dont really matter about the comments.. dont think there will be that many for this one anyways...

Cleverkiwibird said...

yeah this is quite surprising ! :)

haha..

hmm actually you know my mom tried to have the talk with me at Form 2 but the thing is by that time I already knew everything and I think she was quite relieved we only talked for about 5 minutes mostly me reassuring that yes i knew absolutely everything....

but thinking back, we were pretty open about the subject, while we did not discuss positions and toys, we certainly did talk about abortions and pregnancy and this type of things so..mmmm..maybe it was ongoing.. hehe

Jeannie said...

for your sake, eddie, i hope your family never finds your blog.
ahaha..
i think equally as important as asking if you had the talk is how to give your own talk!
i can say from experience, the questions can pop up at any time!
you have to think: will i use 'proper' words like penis or 'kiddy' words like kukuciao?
and what do you call the girls' bits?
not easy being an adult hor?

Edwin said...

told you rite kee win!! hahaha..

you all talked about abortions and pregnancy? shit.. i never even had those kinda convos... its cool though that you and your mum are like.. open and cool with it.. haha and trust me.. im sure you wouldnt reli want your mum to be discussing positions and toys and stuff like that with you!

Edwin said...

haha.. jeannie.. actually.. im reli hopin no one in my family knows about my blog too. though i have a funny feeling that my 2nd sister knows about it and might be reading it rite now.. haha.. but as long as it stays out of everyone else in my family.. its all good..

pop up at any time? from experience?care to clarify a bit there?

i think ill be using proper words already... no ku ku ciao or chun toi in the convo for me... its meant to be a fairly serious talk ... at least thats what i reckon..

Jeannie said...

oohh.. i guess you were already in uk that time.
the little boy i was tutoring in ymca homework club (around 8 years old) suddenly giggled and turned to me:
'hey, you know boys have penis right?'
me: eerrr... yeah
'so, what do they call the girls' one?'
me: (oh shit.. panic panic) eerrm...
(pussy - no... then he'll never see cats the same way again! pepet - no no.. cannot. wrong country. vagina - no no... sounds too vulgar!)
eermmm... i think your mum wouldn't like me if i told you.. eerrr.. ask her.

and that was how rahul learnt what kukuciao is.

Edwin said...

hahaha... man.. just be straightforward man.. hantam only!!! just say.. a womens one is called a vagina.. or pussy.. or flange.. or minge.. front bum.. vertical smile.. things like that!!!

hahaha.. man.. why did you teach rahul that ku ku ciao thing.. by far the most annoyin word of his!

Have a funny feeling that lil kid is following in my footsteps!

Jeannie said...

yeah man..
i also didn't know so many names.
haha... you tell lah. the mother just outside only. omg.
and later he run around chasing girls asking if they have cats in their skirts..
i could've been responsible for creating a sex monster!

Edwin said...

nah la.. you are over exaggerating la.. you wont create a sex monster.. you might just create a replica of me.. thats all

Cleverkiwibird said...

another eddie...thats what we need ! :)

+xinyu+ said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
+xinyu+ said...

i never got the talk from either parent since i skipped into std 5 and learned it in science. further information was provided by my friends while i sat quietly and pretended i knew what they were talking about.

my brothers got an amazing talk from dad, a very formal one with pictures from the visual dictionary. i think they are scarred for life now.

that deleted comment belongs to me. noticed a typo and corrected it before you tease the hell out of me with it.

Edwin said...

standard 5 got learn about it in science wan meh? i swear the 1st time i learn about this sorta thing 'scientifically' was in form 3! i remember all my seniors in school were all like.. you will love science in form 3!!!

They always said.. just remember.. sains! Tingkatan 3 bab 1! hahaha

Wah..thats full on lecture man.. visuals? as in. scientific book visuals or playboy mag visuals?

Edwin said...

eh keewin... all i can say is that.. im awesome and the world should more than welcome another eddie!!!

+xinyu+ said...

visual dictionary. it's this dictionary which has tons of pictures and almost no words except the labels of the things in the pictures, such as all the different kinds of collars you have on shirts and breads and parts of a plant and stuff. pretty interesting if you're a nerd and love pictures.

i think we did! wasn't much though.

Edwin said...

you did? man!!! i wanna be in your school too.. the only thing i learnt in standard 5 was how to play do re mi on my recorder and how to make a wooden pencil case in KH.

visual dictionary... might just get one.. then again is it pictures of real photos? like pictures they draw on anatomy books or photos? hahahaha.. i sound so desperate..hahhaa

+xinyu+ said...

i think we did... or i learned from my friends. *shrugs* just not my parents.

nah, it's all drawn, unfortunately!

pangsai said...

eh! in form 5 my bio teacher showed us an internet animated video clip of a penis entering a vagina i.e sexual intercourse but in a cross section kinda view.. we saw it pump in and out in and out and then it shot white stuff into the cervix... our teacher showed us scientific porn.. xD! cool huh? :D

Edwin said...

what do you mean cross section kind of view? white stuff into the cervix? whats the cervix again? man.. thank goodness i didnt do spm man.. i would have failed big time...

Ooh..random note.. who was your teacher? was it that teacher who lives near my house? shit.. cant even remember his name? the hamsap teacher la.. think i told you b4

Edwin said...

by the way.. isnt it illegal to show you those kinda stuff in form 5? your onli 17 max? thats illegal aint it.. go sue you teacher!

Edwin said...

eh xin yu.. were you from coed school? if your from all girls school and learnt it from your friends... man.. your friends sure gatal wan la!! intro la some of them! hahaha

Drawings.. man.. im disappointed

Cleverkiwibird said...

hahahha....

i think it was not porn..la..it was digital image rite ?
lol

and eddie.. look..at the number of commnets..break record alreayd a not ?

Edwin said...

hahaha keewin.. yea.. broke already.. but not many ppl comment.. considering.. for every comment. .i comment back.. so the actual number of comments is actually half the amount of what you see?

Hahaha.. besides.. dont even have input from harvard, jason, maylin and joe.. where got fun.. haha nevertheless, new record!

pangsai said...

lolz! digital image la.. not porn.. purely legal.. was from some science website.. alot of animated videos 1.. and it wasnt mr austin. lolz! and eh.. xinyu's school is a girls school.. they gatal for girls la. pfft... :P

+xinyu+ said...

yes yes, pure convent girl for 10 years. lesbian tendencies surface after a while, but usually go away after going to college and seeing guys in class for the first time!

used to have to chase everyone out of the toilet for assembly, then you'll see girls emerging from the same cubicle!

and this is going out of topic already...